WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize