playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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