So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Randomize
