Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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