is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
