What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize
