I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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