after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Randomize
