would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
