Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
