Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
a search helicopter?!
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
