eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
All I want is dick and wine.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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