Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
