Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize