After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
