I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I've blown a few things in my day
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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