my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
