I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
