i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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