This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
She's just so happy...and so naked.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
