Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
that is very illegal...i love you.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize