Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
