Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Randomize
