how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize