After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
