i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
