You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize