how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
