it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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