You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
