Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
