hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
