im gay
i know
yea but for you.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
