Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
