He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
