doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
