So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
