I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Randomize
