Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Randomize
