people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I looked at my own cervix.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Randomize
