I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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