Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
