She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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