if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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