:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
