oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
