the condom got lost in my hair
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
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