i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I am mentally ready for anal.
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