I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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