there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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