i don't like sucking hair
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Randomize
